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The Final Word On: Umbrella Academy: Dallas

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For me to sit here and try to sum up the contents of this wonderful book would seem to me, a very foolish endeavor. I couldn’t possibly do the book the justice that it deserves. I’m sure I’d stumble over the many character arcs, plot devices, evolutions and brilliance and end up making a mess of the while thing. So instead, I’ve relegated myself to a bit of free form cock sucking so sad and pathetic you’ll have to find out what the hell I’m talking about.

Gerard Way had written an afterward in this volume that claims he never knew what this book was going to be until he wrote it, or something to that effect. Is this the accidental invention of penicillin, the microwave? More like Hoffman’s accidental discovery of LSD, Umbrella Academy is a mind opening experience and like Empire Strikes Back or Wrath of Khan, this sequel has surpassed the original. Gabriel Ba is either an idiot savant with a pencil or the greatest doodler the world has ever seen. At first glance his artwork seems so simple it brings your little hater out for a stretch, but as page after page turns, you come to realize the perfect arc of each stylized line that so beautifully engineers every nuance of the story from action to emotion. Time travel, presidential assassination, super powers, the successful destruction of the earth halfway through the book and talking freaking monkeys, people! So go out and buy this book. Now.

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